Militant Geek Custom Shirts

Still looking for last minute Christmas gifts? In the midst of your panic why not get them a panic button? From ChipChick:

This red Panic Button is a real computer key that comes with double-sided tape so that you can make it a part of your keyboard. Just don’t put it on top of somewhere stupid like the ESC key or else you’ll really start to panic. Panic buttons retail for $2.50 each, making it a great cheap gift that almost everyone will appreciate. Other novelty computer keys available include keys that say “BEER”, “duh!”, “EJECT”, “Oops!”, “Any Key”, as well as a key with a smiley face and one with a dollar sign.

You can get one for your favorite geek at ComputerGear.com.

From Drivl.com comes an absolutely fantastic list of some of the worst Hollywood Hacker moments in the history of film. Let’s get one thing straight: watching somebody typing for two hours is a horrible idea for a movie. But seeing how some ‘creative types’ try to pump up the action is downright ridiculous. Anyone remember shuddering to this gem?

Ah yes, the good old days when Angelina Jolie could capsize oil tankers with an P1 laptop, dial up modem, and mannish haircut. Those were the days. More Hollywood Geek Nonsense.

At the end of last week, when the readership numbers normally take a nose dive, we at Militant Geek had the pleasant surprise of being linked to by the esteemed Valleywag (which, in Internet terms, is like getting props from the National Enquirer on your muckraking). We can only humbly accept this form of praise and suck in a deep, deep breath - it’s all downhill from here, baby.

When the technical staff consists of geriatric retired circus monkeys and the homeless guy you pay in socks one should just expect that certain liberties will be taken with the website. ‘Working’ and ‘Correctly’ are not guaranteed to live on in blissful union.

We’re working on it and we’ll let you know when we’ve prepared the next round of embarrassment. Ok, the shop links should work (mostly) now. If you see any problems let us know.

Ho-Boy! There have been a lot of high profile reorganization of the corporate org charts lately. Without further ado lets recap the latest in big business musical chairs!

• Yahoo Yawwn! Parody T-Shirts in the Militant Geek Tee Shop - Starting at $15.99

  Yahoo finally got some good news: Google was pulling out of the online answers game, an area where they were directly competing with Yahoo. It was the first victory in the press that Yahoo! has gotten in a long time - their problem lately being perceived as loosers rather than actual financial looses. Before people could get too excited Yahoo! promptly pulled a play from the book of lame and stuffed existing management into each other’s jobs. Bold. Only one real player, Llyod Braun, is moving on to another ship.

• eBay, unlike Yahoo!, knows how to make a shakeup. It axed the entire business development part of its Skype division. People are still wondering what eBay saw in the European VOIP software that warranted a $4 billion price tag. Must not have been the talking heads.
• Next HP is dumping Larry Sonsini, once one of the most powerful lawyers in Silicon Valley. Turns out advising your paranoid clients that tapping phone calls was ok is a bad career move.
• Bram Cohen is gone from BitTorrent, the company he started in his bedroom. The company raised $20 million to pursue deals with major content provides; a business move that is no sure bet. In my mind I like to picture Bram, himself an uber nerd, storming out of the smoke filled board room in righteous disgust. In reality, however, his ouster probably has many more dollar signs written on it.

PayStation Parody T-Shirts in the Militant Geek Tee Shop - Starting at $15.99

The PlayStation has long been a shiny flagship for Sony’s gaming prowess. The PS1 set the stage for a decade of PS related gaming dominance. That streak, however, may be coming to an end.

The Japanese launch of the Nintendo Wii, a competing product that has been showered with critical and fanboy love alike, saw 372,000 units sold in two days. At some locations the queues were 1500 deep. Everyone left pacified; unlike the violence that broke out over PS3 scarcity - the kind of violence that Bill O’Reilly believes isn’t good enough to battle the terrorists with. Even Sony executives were publicly stating that the Wii was more fun than the PS3; a tactic that is sure to boost sales… for the other company:

“Wii is a core gaming device. It’s a more fun, intuitive sort of product to pick up, where the PS3 is a broader entertainment solution…”

“Rrrrriiiight. Because I need another DVD player. Wait, it has a Blu-Ray drive? Why am I still buying breakable discs? Excuse me why I fire up BitTorrent…”

In corporate Japan they no longer expect disgraced warriors to plunge themselves on their swords; today’s hara-kiri is apparently promotion. That’s what happened to Ken Kutaragi, the man many people felt responsible for building such a lofty perch for Sony to fall from. The promotion takes Kutaragi away from the day-to-day operations of the PlayStation. (Truth be told, Kutaragi was actually demoted last year and was hoping to redeem himself with the PS3 - guess that didn’t work out so great.)

Can the PS3 recover?

In between bouts of forced corporate holiday festivity we at Militant Geek actually try to get some work done. Case in point: the new Militant Geek Tee Shirt Store Layout. Hopefully the new spread will be easier to navigate for all involved.

Now back to hiding in the copy room as our co-workers awkwardly try to dance to Burl Ives (shudder).

Bill Watkins, CEO of Seagate (the hard-drive maker and recent purchaser of Western Digital):

At a San Francisco dinner on Tuesday evening, he was candid about his company’s ultimate mission: “Let’s face it, we’re not changing the world. We’re building a product that helps people buy more crap - and watch porn.”

The Militant Geek thinks this is an extremely clever way of getting the kids to ask for hard-drives as stocking stuffers this Christmas.

Apple Parody T-Shirts in the Militant Geek Tee Shop - Starting at $19.99

It’s quite a testament to a consumer good’s popularity when it used as a tool in an international tit-for-tat. That’s the position that Apple’s iPod found itself last week when the US banned their export to North Korea. Is the new iPod shuffle worth exchanging a nuclear bomb for? We shall see…

In related news: Retailers, left with disturbing number of brown Zunes on their hands this holiday season, are excited. There might actually be a market for Microsoft’s maligned music player.