Militant Geek Custom Shirts

Whether being shot into space, flummoxing creationists with their genetic similarities, or torturing Charlton Heston monkeys are the bomb. And now comes this shirt from redbubble.com encouraging monkeys to take up their beakers in solidarity with their human chemistry cousins. After all, if a thousand monkeys typing for a thousand years on a thousand typewriters will churn out Shakespeare imagine what a room full of monkey chemists and everyone’s favorite xanthine alkaloid compound could do.

‘E=MC Bananas’ from redbubble for $23.94.

Today on MilitantGeek I am pleased to present the prototype of the Al Gore environmentally friendly PC. No need to plug it in! Just turn the crank on the side and you have luxurious computing power for less than a minute! Email taking longer than that? Just turn again turn the crank again for a generous, yet fleeting, burst of temporary power.

But wait, there’s more!

Not only is the clockwork PC environmentally friendly but we’ve seen how much time you spend surfing pr0n David Hasselhoff wallpapers how to make vegan burgers taste like something other than sawdust recipes family pictures. With all that hand cranking you not only get the Internets but you get a workout too! It’s just that easy! Operators are not standing by but you can get this incredible tshirt of the clockwork pc for an low, one time payment of $20.99. Click today before your old fashioned computer kills another innocent Brazilian rain forest!

March is almost here and, for many geeks, that means conference season. Technologists the country over will be preparing a few days of intellectual vacation under the guise of continuing education. For inspiration in packing for those trips one needs to look no further than the ‘I Hate Packing’ tee from Adam White on Threadless. It’s got everybody’s lovable geometric shapes tumbling tetris-style into an awaiting suitcase. Mui Bein.

‘I Hate Packing’ available from Threadless.com for $15. You can either use the affiliate link to help keep the Militant Geek in wearable cotton or the non-affiliate link if that’s the way you swing.

You know the media reports: Steve Jobs… blah blah… iPhone… blah blah… elegant design… blah… reality bubble… blah blah… unrelenting ego… blah… black turtleneck. If all that doesn’t deter you from pledging any and all disposable income from that which comes by way of Cupertino you might enjoy this shirt. Its from Indie Tech for $15.

Sometimes life is going along just peachy and in all caps. Then, in other cases, shift happens. Perhaps a simplistic permutation of a classic tee but that doesn’t mean it isn’t worth a smirk.

From BustedTees for $17.99.

In this second shirt in our day of Back to the Future Tees we’ve got the simple math in how to time travel. Take one shower induced flux capacitor design, a subpar late 70’s sports car, and a magical 88 miles per hour and what do you have? Why the future… or maybe just a nice tee.

‘The Future’ is available from Snorgtees for $16.95. The shirts are printed on American Apparel - keep the smaller sizing in mind if you order.

So while Doc Brown wanted to build a time machine with style he made a poor choice by picking the De Lorean. From the Wikipedia article:

Although the early vehicles had impressive waiting lists of anxious consumers, the MSRP sticker price of $25,000 ($62,300 in 2007 dollars[3]) was cost-prohibitive for the majority of the market - especially for what many considered to be an under-powered and impractical plaything. “It’s not a barn burner,” observed Road & Track, “(with) a 0-60 mph time of 10.5 seconds. Frankly, that’s not quick for a sports/GT car in this price category.” The stainless steel body panels were an attractive design concept and impervious to corrosion, but in practice the sheen surface tended to show fingerprints. It also meant that the car could not be easily painted; every factory original De Lorean looked virtually identical.

All those things may be the reason why Noisebot suggests a bus to the future may be more appropriate. Prices start at $20.95 for the Tee and $40.95 for the hoodie.

How awesome is it to wear a shirt that resembles the mass of twisted cables in my spare bedroom? Well, ok, maybe not awesome but real yo. But be warned - within the tangled mess is a hidden viper. Why? Cause it makes a cool shirt.

The design, ‘Caution’, comes from the European store Supermandolini. It’s priced at 24 euros (which, given the crushing plummet of the US dollar, is like $124 - or something). You can pick one up from their online store.

It’s Monday again. Time to drag your party weary self out of the comfort of a snugly weekend and into the bleak wasteland of faux relationships. The people at Threadless feel your pain. They’ve created this homage to the relentless grind. Entitled ‘Corporate Ladder’ it depicts the rabid pursuit of ever higher office space. After all, who needs job satisfaction when you’ve got a desk with a view.

While you may be powerless at work at Militant Geek, however, you’ve got a choice. You can buy this shirt using the affiliate link and help this site out. Or, you can go about your merry tshirt buying way and use the nonaffiliate link. Have a happy Monday!

Well, yet another holiday sees the backside of a retreating day. However, while most are forgotten in a torrential rain of “responsibility” this year I actually had some foresight and put together a themed week. Granted, finding romantic items of a geektacular nature isn’t the easiest beat to cover but if it means days of scouring the Internet under the guise of ‘work’ then I’m your man. Of course, the Militant Geek recap seemed to be over about as fast as what comes after the chocolates but before the regret. Oh well. Was it good for you? What was your favorite Valentines Day geek item featured this week?