Militant Geek Custom Shirts

Boing Boing has such amazing timing. Just the other day I had sat down to watch my soaps when the thought occurred to me: “Gee, wouldn’t it be nice if I had a keyboard affixed to my crotch“. I mean, geez, I get anxiety attacks just contemplating that an input device might be an entire arms-reach away.

Seriously though, this is the kind of apparel idea that only a clueless technosexual could love. And while a pair of speakers built into the knees is begrudgingly cool the placement of the ‘Enter’ key is disgustingly suggestive. Final verdict: fail.

Ask any typographer what the biggest bane of the web is and it is only a matter of seconds before they reply ‘Comic Sans’. Of the handful of fonts the web founding fathers chose to include why one that was fit only to adorn Charlie Brown reprints was chosen is beyond me.

Bad Designer Threads understands my pain. They’ve created this wonderful Tee to proclaim to the world just what punishment should befall those ignorant enough to use this travesty of typographic display. Discovered through Pop Culture Tees. It’s yours for $20.

As seen on Boing Boing comes this incredible, sensational, too - much - goodness - on - one - front tshirt. Depicting silhouettes of science fiction’s most iconic robots ChopShopStore’s WeRobot is a geek tour-de-force. Available for $25.

So why would I be covering ties on a tshirt review site? Well, as hard as it might be to believe, a well coiffed geek can’t wear tees all the time. And while we can’t always wear our favorite apparel there’s no reason we can’t geek up even the most formal attire.

First up is Computer Gear’s Engineering Graph Silk Tie (found via Fashionably Geek). It’ll cost $30 for the luxury of graphing an exponential equation on what is otherwise only useful as a napkin substitute.

Second up, in time for its 30th anniversary, is the ‘Space Intruders’ tie from Amazon.com (I’m guessing its ‘Space Intruders’ instead of ‘Space Invaders’ because of some kind of licensing [or lack thereof] nonsense). To get this game on your wallet will suffer a $24.95 setback.

There is a lot that has been said about software. Some think of software as building a house. Others refer to software as writing a book. But is software like sex? According to Linux head honcho, Linus Torvalds it is. Or more accurately:

Software is like sex. It’s better when it’s free.

Share the sentiment? The shirt is $17.99 from a Cafepress store. Props to Fashionably Geek for finding this great shirt.

This TShirt from Threadless is for fans of CBS’s upcoming new drama - CSI - Vice City. While getting David Caruso to guest star in the pilot was a bit tough (the avatars kept polling in the focus groups as more believable than the original) the show has been green lighted. Every week we can expect the kind of pulse pounding adrenaline-fueled romp that is criminal forensics. The first part of season one has a story arc involving Mario and an increasingly troublesome mushroom addition. From there we shift into some heartfelt explorations of Jack’s attempts to rebuild his life after plasmids nearly destroyed everything.

8-bit Investigation TShirt from Threadless for $20. Affiliate Link: Threadless. Non-Affiliate Link: Threadless.

Pooby5 is a bit unique. Rather than create their own tshirt designs the site serves as a clearinghouse for failed Threadless and Woot designs. It should be clear, however, that one person’s failed design is another’s treasured tee. They’ve got this fantastic Internet Precautions tee. What’s more is that its a very attractive $11.

Recently Glenn wrote to me with the 411 about his TShirt site, Glennztees. Upon arriving I found a number of relevant and interesting designs including ‘Scrap Metal‘, shown on the right. All shirts are printed on American Apparel and this beauty sells for $19.95. Honorable mention goes to the diet coke and mentos space shuttle.

Glennztees is the first custom T-shop from New Zealand that I’ve featured (that I know of). Don’t let the possibility of overseas shipping scare you though. While Glenn is a New Zealander the shop is in the US with the help of Despair (the guys who do the funny de-motivational office poster parodies).

Ok, so there are a lot of caffeine molecule tshirts on the Interwebs. They are nearly as ubiquitous as the ‘No Place Like 127.0.0.1′ apparel. (Did I miss the memo that every geek is supposed to create that when first let loose in CafePress?)

So why am I featuring this particular version from Digital Militia? First, the design is nice and big: caffeine’s effect isn’t small and neither should its representation. Second, they picked a nice Matrix/Xbox’y green that screams geek cred. Finally, I have to tip my hat to the name ‘Digital Militia’ - it’s got a certain ring that hearkens back to another TShirt site I’m particularly fond of. Put that all together in a package that checks out at $17.95 and you’ve found the best of a very, very trite design.

Time Travel t-shirt design @ © SplitReason.com

Given the other Back-to-the-Future Tees featured on Militant Geek you could guess that I’m a bit of a sucker for Marty McFly. There’s nothing like radio-active, flux capacitor powered, crazy scientist engineered homages to get me throwing my wallet at the monitor. This latest Tee from Split Reason is no exception. $19.95 but be warned, time traveler - if they’re out they may advise that you come back yesterday.